Hello, folks. It's Monday. I'm a total mess. I've been sick for over a week now. My head feels gross, my stomach feels gross and I would probably look gross too if my job didn't force me to strap on a pair of heels and put on a little lipstick so as not to send the little old men running to H & R Block instead.

The coffee bean is my only happy place right now. I'm sitting comfortably at my desk sipping on an iced tea latte wishing the snot in my nose would blow out in one blow instead of one hundred million. I would normally be cold except I've had a low grade fever running for about five days. Keeps the space heater off and the power bill low round these parts.

Unfortunately, I've run out of super awesome, witty ways to whine about my current state of affliction. Since I have a plethora of W-2's, 1099, mortgage statements, and other miscellaneous forms that need scanning, filing or shredding and there are plenty of old ladies needing black coffee and a bathroom to use then I have no business blogging at work.

Oh, and as a side note, I look forward to this weekend at the La Costa Resort and Spa for Women's retreat. I'd like a mai tai with a tiny umbrella, a manicure and a relax in the jacuzzi, please. And a whopping dose of Jesus.